8w 5d

Well... things are moving right along, I guess.  In the mornings my tummy is pretty small, but by the end of the day I look like I'm 14-15 weeks pregnant.  Pretty big.  Insane.  I wonder if I have two babies in there.  That would be insane.

I've been so tired lately.  It doesn't help that I now have a cold.  I just feel awful... and I should be sleeping right now.  I've been pretty moody... like I described in my pregnancy with Lila (before I knew I was pregnant), I feel like I'm seeing the world through a cranky filter.  I'm actually okay most of the time, during the day anyway, but by the end of the day, I feel just really yucky.

No morning sickness.  What a blessing.

Nervous to tell my parents... weird.

I've been pretty nervous so far about having a second child... Lila is so needy right now and I'm so worried that she'll still be this way when the baby comes.  I really hope that her "issues" are resolved by then.  It would be a miracle if she was weaned by then too, but that is what I'm praying for.  That would be amazing.  We have 7 months for her to grow and learn and make progress.  Anyway, so I've been pretty nervous and dreading it... but a few things have helped...

On Sunday at church, we sat behind a family with 5 kids... the oldest is a blond girl in YW.  The youngest is a few months older than Lila.  Halfway through Sacrament Meeting, one of the boys, who was maybe 5-6 years old, sat in the oldest girl's lap and she cuddled him and they made funny faces at each other and it was pretty sweet.  I thought, Lila is going to be that older sister someday.  It helps to know that.  Whenever I see a mom and a teenage daughter out together, at a restaurant or at the mall, I smile to myself because that's what I'm working towards...

Also, as I was laying down to take a nap today, the phrase "multiply and replenish the earth" came into my mind.  Before I got pregnant, I was studying Eve and her life and mission.  And that phrase was the thing I took most out of my studies... that it's what I was born to do: multiply and replenish the earth.  And I was filled with a great desire to do that and have another child.  It was a good reminder, and something I need to remember throughout this pregnancy.