Weekend

Well, here we are on Sunday afternoon.  Jake's home-teaching the Mills but should be home soon.  This month's message is about missionaries, so he took his missionary tag, Chinese BOM and children's story book, and I made little bookmarks for the kids that say "I am a child of God" in English and Chinese.

So, yeah.  On Friday I stayed home all day.  Lila slept in late, because she was up so late.  I was so sad all day just thinking about the night before and having to do it over again that night.  Melissa emailed some more "tips" and Jake and I talked a little bit about it, but I did some more praying, thinking, and reading online, and decided that we weren't going to do it anymore.  Well, Jake and I decided that together.  I read on kellymom.com (a breastfeeding website) and other "attachment parenting" websites and they all are proponents of co-sleeping and night nursing if the child wants it.  And it just feels right, and it helped me to know that other parents and babies are on board with this too.

When Jake and I talked about it, I told him the main reason I wanted to try it was because I thought he wasn't getting enough rest during the night and was feeling tired during the day.  He said that he actually was perfectly fine and getting enough sleep at night, and wasn't bothered at all by what we were doing.  That surprised me.  I said that I was fine and getting enough sleep too... I rarely ever feel tired.  So we said, wow, we should have been communicating better about this.  I talked to him more about the reading I'd done and he is on board.  It's sooo good to just have this settled.  I like our hippy lifestyle. ;)  And now we know that this other way doesn't work for us, which is also kind of nice to know... although it still breaks my heart to picture Lila sitting in the dark by herself.  All night, as we were getting her ready for bed, we kept apologizing to her and saying, "I can't believe we did that!"

I posted about it on Facebook and lots of other moms wrote about their experiences.  And Kelsey and AnnaMarie called me to check up on me during the day, which was really sweet and thoughtful!  Mom called too and I cried to her as I told her what happened and she said it was perfectly ok to not do it if I wasn't ready for it or it didn't feel right.  She encouraged me to trust my instincts.  She and Dad tried letting me cry it out when I was a baby and they couldn't hack it either so I slept with them until I was old enough to sleep in a bed by myself, and I loved that and slept fine in it.  I think that Lila will be very similar.  I love the sidecar arrangement we have, because Jake and I have enough room and get to sleep next to each other, and Lila's right there.

Anyway.  That's that.  I had been too depressed during the day to fix any dinner so we got one of Pizza Hut's $10 pizzas.  We actually intended to go to Panera but could smell the Pizza Hut next door so decided to go there.  We were going to eat in but it was way too cold.  I was trying to talk to Jake about some parenting research I'd read about but he couldn't pay attention because it was so cold--he was trying to figure out a way to make it less cold or something--so I asked, "How about we talk about how cold it is?" and he laughed and said, "It is SO COLD!"

Came home and finished Eat Pray Love after Lila went to bed at 9.  Mike went to his first YSA dance at the branch building.  It was really lame at the beginning, as it usually is, because only like 12 people were there.  But he decided to stick it out and had a good time.  Tiffany and Sammi Lillrose showed up, and Tiffany's boyfriend Kent.  Mike hung out with them for a while.  Emily showed up for the last hour. A bunch of people went to Steak and Shake afterwards.