Written last Thursday night

Here we are again, on a Thursday night.  Thankfully, Jake's meeting only went till 8 or 8:30, it was a teleconference meeting.  Emily and Mike were over during that time, and it was nice catching up with Mike.  He was talking about a book he'd just read called "The Proper Care of Husbands" or something like that, by Dr. Laura.  Talks a lot about the backwards ideas that a lot of women in our society have about marriage and motherhood, etc.  He said that it aligns very well with the gospel.  We had a discussion about that, and Emily kind of got offended or a little upset because we talked about how important it is for women to stay at home if that's possible.  Even though men and women are equal, we have different responsibilities--divine responsibilities.  I don't think Emily understands that well enough... I've seen an attitude develop recently that even though she wants to get married (very badly), she's in this "independent woman" type mode... going to school so that she can support herself and work and be independent.  She mentioned that she would probably want to work when her kids got into school.  I mentioned that I think it's really important that the youngest children get as much attention and support from their parents (especially their moms) as the older ones did.  I've seen in a lot of families the moms going back to work or school when they only have 1-2 kids at home, and they're in Jr. High or high school, and sometimes that works well for the family, but a lot of times the children don't get all of the love and support that they need.  I'm especially thinking of Sam and Dan.  Anyway, I mentioned that, and Emily said, "Well, I don't have to worry/think about that now, I don't even have a husband yet."  But I thought, and so did Jake as I was telling him about this conversation, that yes, she does need to think about this now.  It's so important for us to understand our God-given responsibilities.  I've been studying this a lot lately and I feel it so strongly.  I've been listening to a lot of talks from Julie B. Beck and other leaders in the church, both men and women, and I just feel so strongly that women have such an important role as wives and mothers.  It is my sacred duty--and I do feel like it is a duty to God--to be at home with Lila and my other children.  It is my sacred duty to teach them the gospel, to love and nurture them, to feed them and care for them physically.  Just as it is Jake's sacred duty to hold the priesthood, to preside in love, to provide for our family.  One of the quotes of Sister Beck's that I like is this --

God's daughters, we know, have equal importance in His sight with His sons.  They have unique responsibilities and duties in the plan of salvation, and they share some responsibilities in the plan with Heavenly Father's sons.  They also have a unified purpose in our Heavenly Father's plan with His sons.  There is an interesting, exciting, and unique female identity of greatness, richness, that is choice beyond comparison.  And this idenity that the Lord has given us and that we understand through the gospel of Jesus Christ, is in direct contrast to the debased and devalued identity of women that we find in the world today.  We find an elevated, strong identity that comes from our Heavenly Father.  This identity and purpose can only be fully understood through a spiritual confirmation.  There is an intellectual study that can be made, but a spiritual confirmation is what teaches us who we are and what we are to do.  There is much out in the world that is false by way of identity.  There are identities of sensuality, women seeking power, prestige, money, leisure--all of these things are different identities.  But the identity of a daughter of God is precious beyond compare, and rich, and full.  We know that women are the guardians of the hearth and the home.  And they have the responsibility for the hearts and souls of men and women and the children of our Heavenly Father.  They are given this powerful and influential leadership role.  Female responsibilities include being a wife, include being a mother, a daughter, a sister, an aunt, a friend.  This is all about nurturing, teaching, and influencing.  These are non-negotiable responsibilities.  We can't delegate them.  We can accept them and live them, but these are things we understood before we were born, and we can't negotiate with the Lord about whether or not these are our responsibilities.  They have been part of the plan from the beginning; they are not going to change because of any clamor to the contrary... Our Heavenly Father loves His daughters, and because He loves us and the reward at the end is so glorious, we do not get a pass from the responsibilities we were given.  We cannot give them away.  They are our sacred duties and we fulfill them under covenant.

This past week, I have felt, more than I've felt at any other time in my life, the importance of my role as a mother.  I have gained a stronger testimony of the importance of this role, and of the importance of family.  Nothing "big" has happened, but I just feel it.  I've been studying the scriptures, the gospel, conference talks, etc, and it has all been strengthening me so much.  Jake and I have felt so much closer too, because of talks about the gospel and family.